| God |
[04 Apr 2007|11:07pm] |
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My boyfriend is an ass hole.
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[22 Jul 2006|10:13pm] |
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Why do all the good people die?
Why do all the good people get treated like shit?
Why must you feel like shit for the world being shit?
Why do all the great people get torn apart?
why do I feel torn apart?
Am I a good person?
I didn't think so.
Over and out.
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[04 Jul 2006|08:51pm] |
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"Steady, As She Goes"
Find yourself a girl, and settle down
Live a simple life in a quiet town
Steady as she goes (steady as she goes)
Steady as she goes (steady as she goes)
So steady as she goes
Your friends have shown a kink in the single life
You've had too much to think, now you need a wife
Steady as she goes (steady as she goes)
So steady as she goes (steady as she goes)
Well here we go again, you've found yourself a friend, that knows you well
But no matter what you do, you'll always feel as though you tripped and fell
So steady as she goes
When you have completed what you thought you had to do
And your blood's depleted to the point of stable glue
Then you'll get along
Then you'll get along
Steady as she goes (steady as she goes)
So steady as she goes (steady as she goes)
Well here we go again, you've found yourself a friend that knows you well
But no matter what you do, it always feels as though you tripped and fell
So steady as she goes
Steady as she goes
Settle for a girl and buckle down
Send it to the crowd that's gathered round
Settle for a girl and buckle down
Send it to the crowd that's gathered round
So steady as she goes (steady as she goes)
Steady as she goes (steady as she goes)
Steady as she goes (steady as she goes)
Steady as she goes (steady as she goes)
So steady as she goes (steady as she goes)
Steady as she goes
Are you steady now?
Steady as she goes
Are you steady now?
Steady as she goes
Are you steady now?
Steady as she goes
Are you steady now?
Steady as she goes
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[04 Jul 2006|07:50pm] |
Things Dan has said to me that I never want to forget.
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You will never be annoying? Why would you think a thing like that?
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Well you are wanted. And missed too
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I miss you.
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Stop it.
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Happy things
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Well stop it. Think of me.
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Stop that.
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I said stop
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Don't do shit. I swear if you do anything I'll never forgive you. That's final. I told you to stop now stop.
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Ok so like Tennessee
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Body heat is good
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Lol nope your closet ( that's a good one lol)
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You. Finding a job, life. You know normal stuff
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Yes you're a normal thought for me.
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You will live life still. Yes it will hurt and kill you but you can't blame yourself for others decions. You understand me there too?
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Life might be shitty but at least you have me to talk to.
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So i've been told. Some times I don't believe it but yea (reffering to him being a good person)
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Shift your weight huh. So then you can do you're favorite fighting style, right?
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I don't hate you.
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Well you keep pushing me away. And for what?
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Well idk what's going on any more.
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Yeah, you made me happy.
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Don't worry about it. I should apoligize to you for being moddy this past week. Its that time of the month, lol
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Yea certain people have been annoying the shit out of me. Kinda still are. I still think it might be a long time of the month. idk
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Yea I'm just glad I don't bleed. I just get moody. And I love you too
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I would be concerned too. And yea sorry about the whole Sarah thing. Hope things get better for the both of us.
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Yea cause everything is my fault
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Yea but if that were to happen it wouldn't be normal playing.
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I'll play with your pussy any day.
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I feel like I shouls be treated like shit.
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Both sounds sweet because the teas would be tears of happiness
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Oh I wish I could cuddle with you all night dear.
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Please or you make me sad. Even though I know what you want, I still want to hear you say it.
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Well considering we have no power. I'm putting puzzles together. I'm totally bored. Things of you a lot. And I was just thinking about asking if you wanted to box? But how are you?
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Yea I wish I could play with you. Damn do I wish that.
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Damn I can imagine you showering and it sucks cause I'm not able to six my problem now.
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I guess. Fine. You win.
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Never fight in the shower huh! Very interesting, its quite nice.
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Well maybe one day I will show you this style of fighting
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Playing pool. So wish i was in Racine.
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Yea I rather you be in my bed at my parents house all night just cuddling. So every ome know you have a thing for me. Its cute (Awe isn't he cute)
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Just got in a cake fight. I have frosting all over.
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Yea I know I wish the same fucking thing. That would be so sexual. Plus we could take a shower after it all.
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Good night my sweet slave, lol. Muah sleep well muah.
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Fuck you. That's not fair. Teasing me like that. *makes sad face*
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And nor do I. Can I ask what would happen if I was to come back before you left? And maybe got together!
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Idk happy but yet sad that I have this power, as you might say, over you.
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But why hide it for so long?
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Looks can be destracting from real feelings
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Ok not really sure about the whole respect thing.
/End |
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| FLASHBACK! |
[01 Jul 2006|03:22pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 amused |
] |
| [ |
music |
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It wasn't me~ Shaggy |
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"It Wasn't Me"
(feat. Ricardo Ducent)
(Yo', man) Yo'
(Open up, man) What do you want, man?
(My girl just caught me) You let her catch you?
(I don't know how I let this happen) With who?
(The girl next door, you know) Man
(I don't know what to do) Say it wasn't you
(Alright)
Honey came in and she caught me red-handed
Creeping with the girl next door
Picture this, we were both butt naked
Bangin' on the bathroom floor
How could I forget that I had
Given her an extra key
All this time she was standing there
She never took her eyes off me
How you can grant the woman access to your villa
Trespasser and a witness while you cling to your pillow
You better watch your back before she turn into a killer
Best for you and the situation not to call the beaner
To be a true player you have to know how to play
If she say you're not, convince her say a day
Never admit to a word when she say makes a claim
And you tell her baby no way
But she caught me on the counter (It wasn't me)
Saw me bangin' on the sofa (It wasn't me)
I even had her in the shower (It wasn't me)
She even caught me on camera (It wasn't me)
She saw the marks on my shoulder (It wasn't me)
Heard the words that I told her (It wasn't me)
Heard the scream get louder (It wasn't me)
She stayed until it was over
Honey came in and she caught me red-handed
Creeping with the girl next door
Picture this, we were both butt naked
Bangin' on the bathroom floor
I had tried to keep her
From what she was about to see
Why should she believe me
When I told her it wasn't me
Make sure she knows it's not you and lead her on da right prefix
Whenever you should see her make da giggolo flex
As funny as it be by you, it not that complex
Seein is believin so you better change your specs
You know she not gonna be worrying bout things from the past
Hardly recollecting and then she'll go to noontime mass
Wait for your answer: go over there
But if she pack a gun you know you better run fast
But she caught me on the counter (It wasn't me)
Saw me bangin' on the sofa (It wasn't me)
I even had her in the shower (It wasn't me)
She even caught me on camera (It wasn't me)
She saw the marks on my shoulder (It wasn't me)
Heard the words that I told her (It wasn't me)
Heard the scream get louder (It wasn't me)
She stayed until it was over
Honey came in and she caught me red-handed
Creeping with the girl next door
Picture this, we were both butt naked
Bangin' on the bathroom floor
How could I forget that I had
Given her an extra key
All this time she was standing there
She never took her eyes off me
Gonna tell her that I'm sorry
For the pain that I've caused
I've been listenin to your reasonin
It makes no sense at all
We should tell her that I'm sorry
For the pain that I've caused
You may think that you're a player
But you're completely lost
That's why I sing
Honey came in and she caught me red-handed
Creeping with the girl next door
Picture this, we were both butt naked
Bangin' on the bathroom floor
How could I forget that I had
Given her an extra key
All this time she was standing there
She never took her eyes off me
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[27 Jun 2006|08:33pm] |
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and I miss him so much it makes me want to cry
Why did she have to do those things to me..
What did I ever do to hurt her?
Fuck that bitch.
I love him ♥
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[27 Jun 2006|05:50am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 pissed off |
] |
| [ |
music |
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One Headlight~ The Wallflowers |
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That fucking bitch..
She fucked me over so dirty..
She doesn't know I know.
but she will.
she will..
This was is BULLSHIT!
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| ... |
[26 Jun 2006|10:59am] |
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I'm friends with Sarah again...
I don't want to be but its keeping her sane...
at least one of us should be.
I miss Dan more as each day pass.
At least George gets out soon.
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| GAH! |
[25 Jun 2006|10:25pm] |
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"Moving Forward"
At least I'm moving forward.
At least I'm moving forward.
At least I'm moving forward.
At least I'm moving forward...
I stand before, a road that will lead,
Into the unknown. At least unknown to me.
I want to go, but I'm paralysed with fear.
Fear of a choise, where the outcome isn't clear.
Nooo, but still I gooo.
And I take, the first step of a million more.
And I'll make mistakes I've never made before.
But at least I'm moving forward, at least I'm moving forward.
At least I'm moving forward...
I wonder if, the journey will be,
Shorter as I hope, or much longer than it seems.
But either way, I've made up my mind.
I'm through feeling scared, I'm leaving that behind.
Sooo, Now it's time to gooo.
And I take, the first step of a million more.
And I'll make mistakes I've never made before.
But at least I'm moving forward, at least I'm moving forward.
At least I'm moving forward...
And in while I''l be singing,
Na, nana nana
And I take, the first step of a million more.
And I'll make mistakes I've never made before.
But at least I'm moving forward, at least I'm moving forward.
At least I'm moving forward, at least I'm moving forward.
And I take, the first step of a million more!
And I'll make mistakes I've never made before!
But at least I'm moving forward, at least I'm moving forward.
At least I'm moving forward, at least I'm moving forward!
Mo-ving, for-ward.
Mo-ving, for-ward.
Mo-ving, for-ward.
Mo-ving, for-ward...
Na, nana nana
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[24 Jun 2006|02:35pm] |
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"I'm sorry you miss him so much"
ha what a dumb bitch.. Its a lot more then just a miss..
or a wanting to be around..
or a new love..
but empty..
and very much alone.
I'm broken.
Again.
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| ... |
[24 Jun 2006|11:08am] |
To My Love,
I'm sorry I upset you.. and you don't know what to do.. I'm sorry for pushing you away.. I'm just really alone.. and a part of me wants to keep it that way. I used to always oush every one away.. now it seems I only do it to those I care about the most, but then again.. I do keep a lot of people out of my life.. I used to be worse... and I'm glad you didn't see me like that.
You do not have to worry about me.. For I am just a mere child who knows nothing but how to survive. With or without other people. Some times... I wish I didn't have any friends.. or people calling me. I wish almost every day that 80% of the guys I talk to never call again.. and the ones I do want to call never do. And don't even get me started on females..
Most of the people I talk to are just as bad as my parents.. they don't know me and they aren't even trying.. I just look good so they keep talking to me. I'm not treated as a person with feelings by them so much as I am treated like a piece of meat or a nice accessory to a room or party. You don't treat me like that. I think its kinda stupid of me to push away the people that do care.. and keep around the ones that don't.. but that's kinda what I do.. Its kinda what I've always done. I think part of it is.. most of the people ho really care about me or love me like my parents.. Don't know how to show it.. so my mind has kinda warped things. Another part of it is.. If there are feelings exchanged.. and I let my guard down.. I often push away and a second act of defense and I often do it without even realizing what I'm doing.
I do love you.. I really don't want to push you away or make you leave like I did with Sarah. I mean.. I cry looking at your pictures knowing.. that I could never truely call you mine.. and you just walked away.. I understand why you left.. I really do... I just feel as if you kinda just.. turned your back away.. and looked out for yourself.. which i can also understand. because that's kinda what I'm doing when I put you away. I just wish I could be in your arms.. or be able to call myself yours.. I know you probably.. well never mind.. that would have been anoth push away comment.
Just do your best with my heart.. because I've handed it to you on a silver platter.. and every now and then you may feel a tug on the other side. That's just me trying to take it back.. I don't want it back.. but every now and then I am trying to see how well you're really willing to protect it. I test people a lot.. and my theripist was just telling me that what if after a while they get sick of my tests.. well I've come to realize that one of my constant tests is pushing away. She said.. well what happens when people get tired of being tested.. I just recently found out when Sarah said she didn't want to be my friend..
Once again.. I am sorry my love.I await the call that will never come.
Always and Forever,
Your Love Slave
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[23 Jun 2006|10:24pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 cold |
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| [ |
music |
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What hurts the most~ The Rascal Flatts |
] |
Dear Mom & Dad,
I just have a few questions to ask you.. Why do you refuse to accept who I am? Why do you live in denial? Is the real me that bad of a child? or am I just a little too real for you? How can you not tell I've been crying every day? Why don't you at least pretend to listen??
Why after all this time do you blame my friends for my mistakes? Why do I have to be perfect? Why can't I have problems? Why can't I cry without being questioned? Who are you guys really?
After all the years I've been silently screaming.. you never even knew any thing was wrong.. so how can you say I blow things out of proportion?.. Why do you always have to pretend I'm something I'm not? Why can't you see who I am? Do I honestly hide it that well? I love you guys... but you don't even know me.
When I leave.. you will not know why and will probably be lost and confused and worried. I want you to know now that I will be fine. I will not be wondering the streets.. I will have a place to sleep and will think of you every day. I would call you after I leave.. but I don't trust you. I love you guys..
Maybe one day you will see who and what I really am.. I am not a whore.. I'm not a drug addict.. I just make mistakes.. I wish you knew.. I wish you knew every thing.. but you won't and if you did you wouldn't understand why or how.. or what drove me to do some of the things I did.. hell some times I wonder the same thing.. Maybe....Maybe one day, but for now this is good bye.
Sincerly,
The Stranger in your house.
AKA Your Daughter.
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[22 Jun 2006|09:12pm] |
Love Compatibility of Virgo with Taurus
Virgo and Taurus make a great pair - the perfect blend of analytical style and common sense. Since you're both Earth signs, you encourage each other to be productive. You'd be an unstoppable force working together in the business world as well as in your personal life. In your relationship, Taurus will understand your practicality with money, and find ways to get maximum enjoyment out of every dollar you spend together. You are a no-nonsense, down-to-earth couple who can survive the tough times and stay together for many happy years, if not forever.
some times I forget Sarah is a Virgo too..
but she's not suppose to be.. I was no matter what.
Why can't things just click some times?
Like I've said before..
If it were a perfect world..
Hearts would come first
Clubs would come second
Diamonds would be third..
and
Aces would ALWAYS finish last.
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| Kinda |
[22 Jun 2006|09:11pm] |
Me=Depressed
Virgo (Aug 23 - Sep 22)
Others might not see how serious you are now, for you can keep them off guard with your easy-going attitude. Still, beneath the smile you are just as cautious and critical as ever, working to tie up each and every loose end. But there's really no need to struggle now, for no matter how hard you try, you cannot control everything. Choose your battles and let some of the details go.
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[18 Jun 2006|08:47pm] |
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♥ I love him ♥
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[18 Jun 2006|05:38pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 accomplished |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Dani California~ RHCP |
] |
Dear Mom & Dad...
I have fallen in love.. He's older then me but I'm about to be 17.. 3 years isn't that big of a gap.. Please don't try and stop me. I think I could be with him the rest of my life.. No he's not gay.. and we don't really box.. We make each other happy. There are so many things I wish I could say to you.. but none of it is worth saying.. We are leaving in August and I want to spend at least one day with him if he does not come back before then.. if we go there and he still wants to leave then I ask this of you..
Could we please take him home with us.. I promise he won't pee in the car.. and he's very well behaved. He's really sweet and he can sleep in my room. I'll take good care of him I promise.. can I please please please take him home?! I hope you understand I love him.. Please don't taunt and tease him. He's a good boy I promise ma.. A very good influence on me.
There is just one thing.. When he's not around I am nothing.. When he's not around I'm alone. Make the lonliness go away.. Bring him back with me. I love him.. I love him..
Save me???
Your Loving Daughter
Elizabeth L Michalski Reis
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[14 Jun 2006|12:11pm] |
I'm thinking about cutting my hair.. I'm going to cut it dye it black then get hott pink and purple high lights... let me know which one you like best.
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[11 Jun 2006|01:21pm] |
Artists > Silverstein > Call It Karma
Submitted by lost_in_darkness on August 21, 2005
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blame it on the weather, but i'm a mess
and this february darkness. has me hating everyone
and i know i give you comfort, but this trouble makes me sick
and the longer i lay here, i know it's harder to get up
without you
[chorus]
lose another day here
lose another year here
i'm with you
find me something out there, that's making sense
and it's just another trend carefully hidden in your dress
and the cycles neverending, and the fashions overdone
and the further that i run away, the further i'll come back
to shelter...
[chorus]
you are the fire, on my apartment floor
sixteen stories, i'd rather burn then fall
it isn't fate, that took us all by storm
it's just the turn of a card
[chorus]
you are the fire, on my apartment floor
sixteen stories, i'd rather burn then fall
it isn't fate, that took us all by storm
it's just the turn of a card
goodbye old friend
goodbye goodnight
i'll move on
you'll call it fate, i'll call it karma
we had our time, it was fun
while it lasted
i'll look back, with honor
and no regrets
i won't be mad, won't feel bad
these memories will never leave me
don't be sad
cause life goes on, life goes on
it's getting too late
tomorrow is here |
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